Unfortunately, church attendance in the US has been on the decline for several years. As a lifelong Christian and someone who loves God’s Church deeply, this makes me sad. But I also understand how easy it is to become disappointed and disillusioned with stereotypes of Christians, false teachers, or hurtful congregations. That’s why I want to help people find a new church rather than leaving organized religion completely. Read on for my tips for finding a place to worship and good questions to ask a church before joining. And be sure to get a free customizable church questions interview document before you go! 

If you want to dig into the decline more, check on this article on church statistics for 2021, this one on membership falling below the majority, and this one on why some people leave organized religion.  

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Set Realistic Expectations for Your Church

Before we get started, it is important to note that no church is perfect, nor should we expect them to be. We must reject a consumerism view of church where we are only asking, “What can you do for me?” There is much to be said for joining a congregation and riding out the highs and lows together. I do not believe that having a minor disagreement on interpretation, thinking the worship minister’s beard is too long, or being upset about the size of the communion cracker is reason to jump ship on a church you’ve attended for years.

Conflict within the body dates back to the early church. Acts 6:1-7 provides an example of how the Greek-speaking believers thought their widows were being discriminated against in food distribution. The disciples called a meeting of the church and came up with a plan to solve the problem that people were happy with. It empowered other members and the church increased because of it. This is a great illustration of how speaking up can lead to healthy resolution of issues and growth.

Sometimes frustration with the church is due to broken relationships with other members rather than a doctrinal issue. The Bible gives us guidance on how to deal with conflict with other believers in Matthew 18:5-7. This is important to remember before turning to gossip or damaging reputations beyond repair. Dealing with frustrations in this way can provide healing to you and your interaction with the church.

However, there are legitimate times when it is time for you to move on. I encourage you to prayerfully consider these things and make a decision that helps you be closer to God. Too often people stay in an environment where they are unhappy, leading to bitterness and discord. Hear me when I say that it is okay to leave a church. It is much better to find a place of worship where you can thrive than to stay somewhere hurtful out of a sense of loyalty or convenience.

I believe that many nonpracticing Christians let a bad experience with one church influence their opinion of the Church at large. In worst-case scenarios, those negative feelings transfer to God as well. Sometimes looking for a new church is the product of something much simpler like moving, a change in life situation, or wanting to learn from a new perspective.

Regardless of the situation, I hope this helps you find a church where you can grow, serve, and find community like that described in Acts 2:42-47.

Narrow Down Your List of Potential Churches

After you have made the decision to look for a new church, it can be hard to know where to begin. A simple Google search can tell you churches near you in the denomination of your choice. But you may get more personalized information by asking friends, neighbors, coworkers, or on social media for recommendations. If you live in the “Bible Belt” like me, the choices can be overwhelming! That’s why you need to narrow your list to ones that seem like possibilities.

First, I suggest checking out church websites and social media pages. You can get a feel for how the church prioritizes things and responds to current events. Many churches have easily accessible statements of faith, bios of staff and leadership, and details on programming. I love it when they also tell you exactly what to expect when you attend.

This leads me to my next tip for finding a new church. Visit a service! If it is safe and you feel comfortable, drop into a church service. Some of you love new experiences and meeting new people, so this is a fun part of the journey. Others may put off finding a church because the thought of being a newcomer in an unfamiliar place keeps you up at night. Or maybe you have young kids and it is a logistical nightmare to church hop.

While the pandemic has definitely rocked church attendance, it has provided an amazing opportunity to experience different preaching and teaching from the comfort of your home. It is easy to find a streaming service for tons of churches, something many didn’t offer before. Whether you watch live on Sunday or go through the archives when it is convenient, being able to see and hear the music, lesson, and announcements is the quickest way to know if a church is a good fit for your family.

Questions to Ask Potential Churches

After you have filtered your search down to a few options with the steps above, then I suggest reaching out to the church staff with questions. You could start with a simple email that says you have some questions as a prospective member and see how they would like to answer them. Or go ahead and send your inquiries and see what they do. If nothing else, you will see how accessible the staff and pastors are and how they react to questions.

These questions are also good even if you have been attending a church for some time. They may help you decide whether it’s a place you want to join, how you can plug in, or if you need to reconsider things.

15 Good Questions to Ask a Church

What is the church’s statement of faith? How was it devised?

Explain the gospel to me in your interpretation.

How does the church define success? What are the strengths and weaknesses of the church?

How are finances handled and kept accountable? How much goes to debt? How much to local and global outreach/missions?

How is the church governed and what qualifies someone to be in leadership? How long have current pastors and elders been in their roles?

How does one join the church? What role do members have?

What’s the role of women in the church? Why do you believe this way?

What are the demographics of the church? Are most people long-time attendees or relatively new?

What do you think is the most difficult issue facing Christians today?

What is the church’s position on marriage, divorce, and homosexuality? Racial justice? Social issues? Politics? Other hot-button issues?

What theological hot topics and areas of false teaching would the church leadership be particularly concerned with right now?

What do you do to grow and disciple kids?

How do you handle church discipline? In what circumstances have/would you use it?

How does the church serve the community and encourage the congregation to do the same?

How can I serve here?

You can download a free copy of these questions in a format you can customize for your personal use here. 

Use This As a Starting Point

Use this list as a starting point to get the information that is important to you. You’ll notice that my goal is to allow the church to give me answers without telling them my opinions and interpretations. I don’t want an echo chamber, but a realistic view of how church leadership thinks. In my mind, it is better to discuss things up front than to be surprised down the road.

What questions to ask a church would you add to this list? Leave them in the comments below. I’d also love to hear about the conversations sparked by these questions. And don’t forget to download your own customizable copy of the questions here.

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